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Peloton Down Horrendous
Stocks were down again yesterday, Biden supports JPow's monetary tightening, Fauci said we might vaccinate toddlers soon, Biden thinks Russia might invade Ukraine, Qatar World Cup tickets are PRICY, the Microsoft deal hurt Sony's stock price, tide pods are going to be pricy, and Peloton execs cashed out big.
Microsoft's $69B (Nice) Acquisition
Microsoft offers $69B to buy Activision (which means you can VLOOKUP your K/D ratio), Peloton plans to lay off 41% of sales and marketing staff, Europe energy bills are through the roof, OnlyFans hires federal lobbyists (OnlyFeds?), Goldman paid its employees a ton, Coinbase & MasterCard partner to let users buy NFTs with credit cards, Shopify expands in China, and Sofi can finally become a bank.
Djokovic Got Aced
Djokovic got booted from Australia, bank earnings are coming in hot all week, Southeast US got clapped by a winter storm, Netflix raises prices, Tiger Woods has a SPAC, Unilever looks for a massive acquisition, VC deals hit an all-time high, everyone can order free at-home covid tests, Morgan Stanley named 199 new MDs, and the only thing performing worse than Chamath's SPACs is his public relations.
Not-So-Royal Family
Prince Andrew is now simply "Andrew", indexes were red across the board, several bank earnings today, Earth was HOT in 2021, Supreme Court blocks Biden at the rim, Delta (the airline, not the variant) had great revenue numbers, Navient cancelled a lot of student loans, PPI data came in lower than expected, and Elizabeth Warren blamed "greedy grocery stores" for inflation.
Party Like It's 1982
Inflation came in HOT with a 7% YoY increase, workers made more money and got poorer anyway, markets were green again, Turks hope Bitcoin can save them, Saudi Wealth Fund wants to buy lots of stocks, TPG goes public today, and China's 'zero-covid' policy gets a stress test.
Citadel Securities - the new tech unicorn?
Citadel raised outside funding, CPI data dropping at 8:30, stocks bounced back yesterday, US daily covid cases hit all-time highs, Citi pulls the plug on some Mexican banks, China thinks it found water on the moon, Rivian's COO said adios, Meta mandates covid boosters (which raises the question: can you catch covid in the metaverse?), United cuts 3,000 flights, Spain says covid in endemic, Pfizer has (another) new shot, Adidas signed a fat office lease in LA.
Eli Manning Went from QB to PE
Goldman predicts four rate hikes which means there will probably be zero, Djokovic beat Australia's travel restrictions, AOC caught the 'vid, Eli Manning is now a PE guy, Some schools (probably) colluded to restrict financial aid, Stocks bounced back in the afternoon, JPow talks to the Senate today, new CPI print drops tomorrow, 'deltacron' might be fake news, and Zynga is getting bought out at $11B.
BREAKING: Crypto
Omicron and delta have a hot M&A deal in Cyprus, Britain is "beyond covid" (whatever that means), NYT paid a lot of money for The Athletic, a16z raised another $9B, interest rates keep going up, tech stocks keep going down, Nasdaq down 4.5% on the week (or 234% annualized), crypto has a rough start to 2022 (NFT holders sweatin big), Reddit taps the big banks for its IPO, unemployment rate is low, Chamath might have another SPAC deal, and the UK has one expensive power bill.
Can't Stop, Won't Stop, GameStop
Yields keep climbing, tech stocks keeps crashing (is this the Dotcom crash of 2022?), EU sets new high score on daily virus cases, France is fining big tech, Ghislaine Maxwell might get the OJ Simpson acquittal, the metaverse is poppin' with 2M Oculus downloads, Bently sales are off the chain as the rich keep getting richer, and GAMESTOP WENT PARABOLIC ON NEWS THAT IT WILL ENTER THE NFT AND CRYPTO MARKETS.
ARKK Is Sinking
ARKK hits its lowest price since September 2020, Interest rates keep climbing, Fed plans more aggressive tapering, Rivian drops 10% (but is still worth infinity x sales), Fauci says omicron ain't too bad, Meta fights back against the UK ruling on Giphy, Bitcoin hasn't been a great inflation hedge, (but 1 BTC is still 1 BTC), and Warren Buffett quotes are everywhere as tech investors get wrecked.
Rich Ape Yacht Club
Growth investors bought the dip but it keeps on dipping, value stocks are ripping, bond yields are booming, bank stocks are cruising, Toyota passed GM as America's #1 automaker, everyone is quitting their jobs, Evergrande has more bad news, Monkey JPGs hit $1B in sales, and Ford plans to double production for electric trucks ⚡️
🩸 Bad Blood
Markets closed at ATHs 100% of days in 2022 so far, Apple is worth $3 trillion, Elizabeth Holmes was found guilty (but in 2021 Theranos would have been a great SPAC merger), Prince Andrew got caught in Epstein's web, Starbucks told employees get vaccinated or get out, another Pfizer booster got approved, and Tesla stock is once again a rocket ship.